LAW & LOA-R-DER !!! TO START OFF OUR TALL TALES, THIS WAS TOLD TO US BY AN ANCIENT HML EMPLOYEE….. SEEMS THE WEST MIDLANDS POLICE, AROUND 1984/5, NEEDED SOMETHING TO CLEAR BURNING LORRIES FROM THE STREETS OF SOMEWHERE CALL HANDSWORTH….APPARENTLY IT WAS LIKELY THAT THE LOCAL INHABITANTS MIGHT CAUSE THIS SORT OF MAYHEM, SO THE FORCE WENT TO HML FOR A SOLUTION.
THE BRIGHT SPARK AT HML "WEIGHED" UP THE SITUATION, AND DECIDED THAT A TEREX 72-41 WAS THE IDEAL ITEM (STUCK DOWN THE LINE, UNLOVED AND UNWANTED) AND WOULD BE CAPABLE OF LIFTING (WEIGHED, EH !!) A LORRY OF A CERTAIN BURNING SIZE….BY CUTTING AWAY THE BUCKET SIDES, AND USING IT LIKE A FORK LIFT…..NO PROBLEM.
THE BOYS IN BLUE THOUGHT THAT THIS "WERE MAGIC MERT" AND IN NO TIME AT ALL, THE MACHINE WAS REPAIRED, PAINTED WHITE (IT NEARLY HAD JAM SANDWICH STRIPES) FITTED WITH A BLUE FLASHING LIGHT, AND COMPLETE WITH PRICE TAG OF £16,000 LEFT FOR BIRMINGHAM, NEVER TO RETURN.
IT NEVER RAISED A HOIST RAM IN ANGER APPARENTLY SO OUR SOURCE WAS TOLD, BUT IT DID TURN UP ABOUT 10 YEARS LATER IN A PLANT YARD NEAR BRUM, STILL WITH A PRICE OF £6000 ON IT…GOOD WORKMANSHIP AT HML, MADE TO LAST !!
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BRUNO !! FARMER SIMON INCE, FROM NEAR ST NEOTS CAME IN ONE DAY TO VISIT OUR HML SOURCE, AND WANTED TO LOOK AT A B4LOT BEING ADVERTISED, WHICH OF COURSE, AS YOU ALL KNOW, WAS CUMMINS POWERED TS-24 !!
HIS EXPLANATION WAS THAT HE WANTED TO TURN IT INTO A TRACTOR !! HML SALESMAN BEING WHAT THEY WERE, COULD NOT GIVE A MONKEYS **** WHAT HE WANTED TO DO WITH IT, SO LONG AS HE PAID THE ASKING PRICE, SO THE DEAL WAS STRUCK, AND THE SCRAPER DELIVERED.
THE NEXT TIME ANYONE HEARD ABOUT IT, WAS WHEN MR INCE CALLED THE OFFICE TO SEE IF ANYONE WANTED TO HAVE A LOOK AT THE MACHINE SINCE (INCE) HAD BEEN PLAYING WITH IT, SO A REP WAS DISPATCHED AND …….
… WHAT HE FOUND WAS THE TS-24 SLICED IN TWO, BOX, DRAFT ARMS ETC ALL REMOVED, AND THE SWAN NECK COUPLED DIRECT TO THE REAR CHASSIS….THE MAKINGS OF A 600HP TRACTOR !!
A FEW MONTHS LATER, A PHOTO WAS SENT TO NORTHAMPTON, THIS TIME SHOWING "BRUNO" AS IT WAS NOW CHRISTENED, IN HIS BEST WORKING CLOTHES, AND READY TO WORK. 
HE WAS TAKEN TO SEVERAL SHOWS, INCLUDING THE EAST OF ENGLAND AT PETERBOROUGH, BUT THE BEST PART WAS HIS WORKING ABILITY….WITH SOMETHING CALLED A PROGRESSIVE PLOUGH, HE COULD TAKE HOURS TO DO WHAT NORMAL TRACTORS DID IN DAYS, AND YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE THE SIZE OF HIS MOLE DRAINER, SO OUR SOURCE TELLS US !!
UNLIKE ALL FAIRYTALES HOWEVER, THIS ONE DID NOT HAVE A HAPPY ENDING…..ONE NIGHT WHILST CONTRACT PLOUGHING (AND THIS IS WHERE IT GETS TECHNICAL, ME, EEF, SSW, PLEASE NOTE) A FIRE IN THE FRONT ENGINE WAS SUCKED THROUGH THE "TUNNEL" (THE SWAN NECK), MADE TO ACCOMMODATE THE 150 GALLON FUEL TANK, BY THE REAR ENGINE FAN, AND INSTEAD OF SHIT HITTING THE FAN, THE FLAMES DID, AND THE FOLLOWING WAS THE RESULT….
…A SAD END FOR MR INCE, AND BRUNO, BUT NOT OUR INSPIRED HML REP, WHO FINISHED OFF THE BUSINESS BY SELLING THE CARCASS TO NEIL BECHER FOR SPARES, FOR HIS TS-24`S…..ITS AN ILL WIND THAT BLOWS NOBODY GOOD !!
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